Fairyfloss

she tasted like fairyfloss,

sweet at the start,

but overpowering in the end.

-Fairyfloss//TaleofanUnlikelyWarrior

 

heyyyyy. Quick update – feeling really great at the moment. Life is good.

love you all,

your joyful poet,

xx

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Breath

you say I don’t talk anymore,

but you never give me a chance to catch my breath.

-breath//Taleofanunlikelywarrior

 

heyo. Life is turning around!

love you all,

your grateful poet,

xx

I wish I could give my life

 

i wish I could give my life,

to someone who deserves it,

but it doesnt work that way,

life sucks but it is okay.

 

 

heyy feeling a bit more unstable at the moment. I couldn’t sleep last night, the voices were chattering in my head again. The cuts on my ankles are growing and I feel myself collapsing in on myself. But I am okay.

love you all,

you heavy burdened poet,

xx

Cuts

i started 2019 by cutting

because im a hopeless girl

lost in the complexities

of the human world

 

 

hey guys. Trying not to cry right now. I promised myself 2019 would be a better year but yesterday I kept making people upset. I’m such a shitty person and I can’t do this anymore. I’m scared. So so so scared. The cuts on my wrists are stinging, a fresh reminder of the disaster that I am.

I hope you all started 2019 better than I did.

 

love you all,

your scared and desperate poet,

xx

He rested his head on my shoulder

He rested his head on my shoulder,

Tears trickling down his chin,

‘Twas him who broke my heart,

It was but on a whim

 

hey guys. It’s that time again, where my creative juices have dried up and my poetry becomes pretty shitty. Fingers crossed I’ll get out some more decent poems before the end of the year. Also, if anyone feels like potentially collaborating on a short story (or long story) drop your email down below and I’ll add you to a google docs or something.

 

love you all,

your exceedingly crappy poet,

xx

Me discussing my mental health Pt 2

*clap clap mental health review**

Welcome to Part 2 of me being stuffed up. I am your host and this episode we will be talking about why I don’t talk about my prevalent issues to friends or family.

Family

I am a very closed off person and … well I don’t think my parents understand the term mental illness very well. Just the other day they said that they were ‘disgusted by anyone who self harmed’ (aha rip me then) and ‘couldn’t live with someone who felt wrong with themselves’ (completely and utterly rude)

I think as being from Gen Z I am a lot more aware of mental illness as the issue seems to be a lot more prevalent in our society.

I don’t want to talk to my parents about my issues.

  1. Because they won’t accept it (you can argue all you want but it’s the truth)
  2. I don’t want things to change/get awkward between us (what can I say?! I don’t like change)

Friends

As previously mentioned, my friends could tell when I started heading down-hill, after I didn’t talk much and ate less. Soon after, my relationships became more forced so I repressed my emotions and tried to head back to normal (I still have my moments). Two of my friends know I have panic attacks and I confessed my feelings to one of them a while ago. I made them promise to do nothing about it and pretended to get better. As well as this, I don’t feel strong enough to confide my true feelings to any of them. I’m not really a people person and would prefer to shoulder the burden on my own.

Conclusion

Overall, I think that part of the reason I don’t want to talk to anyone about my struggles is that I’m not strong enough and that I am petrified of change. I’m hoping that with time, I will get better on my own.

*drumroll*

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Thank for tuning into this weeks episode and stay aware for the next segment on how my mental health affects my social life.

 

once again,

love you all,

your messed up friend,

xx

‘She doesn’t try enough’

She doesn’t try enough,

She wastes all of her time,

Says she has no homework,

Her idleness is a crime.

 

She tries,

Maybe not as much as others,

But at least she tries,

Better than you being a poor excuse for a mother.

 

How can you say that she doesn’t try,

When you don’t see her practice,

You’re out all day,

And all night.

 

She slaves for you,

She struggles for you,

She burns and cries and wails for you,

Maybe you need to try harder.

 

 

Going through a lot right now and my mum isn’t helping. She keeps complaining about my sister getting above average but still ‘not good enough’ grades. She thinks that we are the same person and is away so much and is so unaware of what is going on in our lives. I wish I could say I only dislike her but I can think of a few stronger words than that.

love you all

xx